What I Went Through This Month

Dear All,

All I can say is that this month has been a wild ride. There was a lot of research, which did get frustrating at one point, and there was also finding an interviewee... boy did that keep me on my toes!

But worst of all...

I was struggling with my story paradigm. The first time I turned it in this month, my instructor said there were a few lose ends, so of course that meant redoing it... worst of all, my pitch and outline were due around the corner... so the pressure was on.

My story paradigm had to match my outline and logline, but you know what the best part was?

 my pitch had to reflect it all!! 


worst part is, it wasn't and so of course I was freaking out! and so I rewrote my story paradigm and I sent it to my instructor and it still wasn't working!

Gah! I wanted the earth to open up and swallow me whole!!!


I was frustrated and started to think that maybe this wasn't for me...
        ... yes, I began to doubt myself, but I kept on going.

Over the weekend, after I read my instructor's additional feedback, I went back to work and worked I did... I didn't come out of my bedroom unless I had to eat... and I had a big mess and I didn't care. In fact I lost my phone somewhere in the chaos...

For the first time I felt like a writer and believe me, I felt like I finally got it... I finally understood their world.  My life this weekend was in peril




Maybe I'm overreacting but that's just how I felt it... and then when I had to record my pitch, everything was going wrong... I was close to tears and then my file was large and wouldn't upload... yeah... I was loosing it!!!


But I made it in time... Thank God! but now I wait...

You see, every pitch will be review by the department, and they will determine if your story is accepted or if it will be fixing or worst of all... redoing everything!

Believe me, I'm anxious... very anxious!

It's like when the writer sends their novel out for approval and they are now waiting and all these ideas come and torture them because they begin to doubt their talents...

GAH!!! It's scary


But whether I receive good or bad news there is one thing that I must keep remembering... If I love to write then I must not quit but continue...


If you stumble, get up for it just makes you stronger...


Dear writers, 


don't give up no matter how grim your future looks... if you love to write then this little obstacle should only reflect the passion you have for this art...




Eva